Tummy Rumble

Since not that many people read my blog anyways, I thot it'd be safe to share these with the privileged few..

We're probably going next week! Will we see you there? Then again, if I can't get a reservation, I know who I will be cursing.. haha..

Yum yum yum!

Crack

2 of the brudders have combined their resources to rent a condominium bachelor pad.. under circumstances which are less than usual..

and boy was it quick.. they saw the apartment this past monday, agreed on the rental rate on Friday, and we went to the new place with a lorry-load of stuff, all ready to move in.

It's a little funny seeing the strange (read: bad) taste that your friends may have in clothes.. I was helping 1 of them unpack his stuff, and saw the most outlandish shirts that he probably wears only to sleep, hopefully, intends to use as rags.. heh..

And it'd soon be interesting to find out their hygiene habits now that they've got to do their own washing, drying, etc. I happen to know that 1 of them doesn't have too many pairs of shorts to wear at home.. imagine him walking around only in his boxers.. actually, I think he wears briefs.. hahaha...

Some of the more interesting things he brought over:
a. Risk and Monopoly - source of endless amusement for the brudders
b. aromatherapy burner - seduction's foremost on his mind
c. the stinky pillow he's had since it was 7

Our first dinner at the new Brotherhood clubhouse was *drumroll* KFC and pizza hut.. everyone was bushed from the moving and had no energy to go out for dinner. The celebratory sparkling pinot I brought must have done us in even further, for TL and I decided to head home to sleep around 10pm..

+++

As I open the cab's door, I felt it bang into my left berms pocket.. as expected, the screen of my 6230's cover cracked, again!

Same thing happened to my 6610 last year.. I was too stingy to change the cover even tho the cracks made it hard to read sms messages... my then-secretary got so fed up she bought a purple one from some pasar malam and replaced it when I went to the washroom..

The next 2 months, I got some pretty strange looks from colleagues, clients and friends..

Finally got fed up and bought an original.. $30+.. geez! Suspect the cover for the 6230 is around $60.. pain man...

Bow before me

for I am the Ideal Lover.. hee hee

Your Seduction Style: Ideal Lover

You seduce people by tapping into their dreams and desires. And because of this sensitivity, you can be the ideal lover for anyone you seek. You are a shapeshifter - bringing romance, adventure, spirituality to relationships. It all depends on who your with, and what their vision of a perfect relationship is.

What Is Your Seduction Style?

Neckin'

Source

The Zoo's new giraffes are in! Obviously polar bears are my favourite animals by far, but dogs and giraffes slug it out for second place..

humans (generally)? ranked barely above crocodiles, cochroaches and spiders..

Oops

Was going to charge my handphone when I realised that I had apparently called 999 this evening.. probably when my phone was in my pocket..

Wonder what the police do when they get such calls? At which point do they feel safe enough that it is a prank / accidental call and hang up, when it could have been an abducted person instead..

New Record!

Managed to clear my work email inbox such that it's only got 4 emails! Woo hoo!

What I do when I can't sleep

Read a similar post in someone else's blog (thanks!) but didn't know if she wants to be linked, so..

Heard something a little disturbing last night, but surprisingly it didn't affect me as much as I thought it would.. maybe I've finally been able to start to let go cos it's slipping out of my fingers.. I probably only lay awake for 2+ hours instead of the usual 4 (out of the average 6.5 to 7 hours of sleep I get on a weekday night).. now, I just need to move on..

But anyways, what I do when I can't sleep, in order of likelihood:

1. Toss and turn like crazy
2. Usually, I can't sleep cos I'm troubled abt women or money, and I start thinking more and more and more, and get more and more depressed, and end up sleeping only 2 hours the entire night..
3. Blog
4. Swig whiskey, tho it hardly works... I remain fully awake from the moment I feel the burn down my throat, thru the nice warm feeling, and even after the warmth is all gone..
5. Get up to pee 4 times throughout the night
   

I wish I could send "hate" sms-es.. but don't have the heart to...

Can't Wait

Have seen the trailers for Madagascar for some months now.. it looks awesome!

I can safely say many of the guys my age know where Madagascar is, and it's cos of playing Risk! The only other thing I know about Madagascar is it produces some of the world's best vanilla beans, or at least so say Haagen Daaz...

Separately, as part of the new "know your client" initiative, you can email this blog at thewhorewithmore@gmail.com

CMI Jedi

I've never been much of a Star Wars fan, mostly because I like real-world stories rather than those of galaxies far far away..

So I was shocked to see how cannot make it some of the Jedi were when they were slaughtered by Lord Sidious.. I don't even recall their light sabres actually having contact with Sidious'... The answer is that there are different types of Jedi (makes sense) - warrior ones, scholar ones and healer ones... and which type they are more or less determines their color of their light sabres..

There are four unofficial types of Jedi, the Jedi Guardian, the Jedi Sentinel, the Jedi Consular, and the Jedi Healer. The first three titles are not used in the Star Wars Universe, but given in the Roleplaying Game and Video-games to define the distinctive roles a Jedi can have. Selection of a Jedi's type takes place at the transition to Padawan. Certain lightsaber colors are keyed to the different types, but this is not always followed.

• Jedi Guardians are the type of Jedi who focus more on martial training and combat. These, like all Jedi, are keepers of the peace, acting as a kind of special police force under the direct control of the Chancellor. Notable Guardians include Obi-Wan Kenobi, Mace Windu, Anakin Skywalker and Luke Skywalker. In video games such as Knights of the Old Republic, Guardians are said to have a blue lightsaber, though the choice of the colour remains valid only during the early part of the apprentice stage.

• Jedi Consulars are the type who possess great knowledge of the Force but rarely enter combat. Consulars are the primary scholars and diplomats of the Order. They often became members of the Jedi Council or teachers to younger Jedi. The most famous Consular is Yoda. After her training, Leia Organa Solo also became a Consular. In games, Jedi Consulars are said to control the green lightsaber.

• Jedi Sentinels try to strike a balance between the first two types and possess admirable combat skills with some extensive knowledge of the Force. These are often dispatched to regions across the galaxy to work as ambassadors and investigators for unusual concentrations of the Force. Bastila Shan and Visas Marr are examples of Jedi Sentinels. In games, Jedi Sentinels may have the yellow lightsaber.

• Jedi Healers use the Force in conjunction with medical and psychiatric training to help allieviate illness, pain and suffering wherever they encounter it. They are sometimes assigned to medcenters or mobile medical units on various worlds. Barriss Offee is an example of a Jedi Healer who worked in a RMSU (Republic Mobile Surgery Unit) during the latter part of the Clone Wars. Jedi Healers have been known to use the lavender lightsaber.

• 
  

Yoda

The recurring thought in my mind as I watched Star Wars today was: which is the nicest light-sabre color?

I think blue. You?

You're It

You people may not know it, but I listen to songs without the lyrics really registering in my head.. the Sacrilege! When people tell me the song's really meanginful, all I can give in return is a weak "uh huh"...

Total volume of music files on my computer:
2.65Gb — 643 songs — 3.1 days (As you can see, I've got some audiobooks like *gasp* The New Testament!! But it goes too fast for me to be able to ponder abt what was just said)

The last CD I bought was:
Josh Groban Live at the Greek

Song playing right now:
Lose Your Way - Sophie B. Hawkins

Five songs I listen to a lot, or that mean a lot to me:
Chances Are - Bob Segar & Martina McBride - this is def a song at my wedding
In My Life - Beatles
Prelude in C Major - Bach
Hallelujah - Rufus Wainwright
The Prayer - Celine Dion & Andrea Bocelli

Five people to whom I’m passing the baton:
Li-Er
One Little Twit
FF
Snowy Stars
Ms M&M - you know who u are, but I won't link ure blog in case u want the privacy

Quagmire

In real life, I'm the almost-always smiling, congenial person.. usually the one listening to other people's problems, cos, well, I have few problems of my own..

There are days when I listen to you bitch on and on about work and colleagues (I don't mind at all, cos it makes me feeled needed in your life, which I again and again mistakenly assume suggests that you want/need to spend your life with me), and when you ask in return how my day was, the answer's usually "not too bad", because, well, it was ok lor... (for the record for the blog readers, I'm hardly uncommunicative)

And now, we are both burdened by the same problem... of course it weighs upon you greater than it does on me... but I can't quite tell you how i feel cos it might make the decision harder for you, and throw all sorts of unnecc emotional weights on 1 side of the balancing scale...

I mentioned this bit in my post regarding my granny - is it worse to suddenly find that someone's gone, or to see him / her slipping out of your hands before your very eyes? Of course, the thing that most sux about the latter is your helplessness at the whole situation, and that's just what i'm feeling right now..

At first, it was "to do it or not to do it?"... now it's morphed into "to do A or to do B?", i.e. ure doing it for sure.. amazing that in my mind, when it was the former situation, I still had hope, no matter how small it was, that u'd not do it.. but when the latter scenario came, that mini-hope evaporated and I was forced to hope for something which I'd just a while ago really hoped wouldn't happen...

I know it's selfish, but if it's option B, I wish I get over you really quick...

There was a time when what we spoke of on Sat mornings and Sun nights were our dreams, and sharing an apartment together.. where are those days?

Just because I don't blurt it in your face doesn't mean that I'm ok

anyways, I was about to pop a sweet I found into my mouth, and saw that there were 2 dead ants stuck to the sweet.. they must have gotten there during 1 of the hot afternoons we suffered last week... what a way to die...

Chubb-y

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to obedience and warmth.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

BTP 170505

The bomb dropped today... 170505

Shibboleth

One of my favourite words..

Was reading Tym's post, which linked to another site on My Jesus.. Only skimmed through the latter post, but 1 word jumped out at me - Shibboleth.

The meaning from Merriam-Webster:

Etymology: Hebrew shibbOleth stream; from the use of this word in Judg 12:6 as a test to distinguish Gileadites from Ephraimites, who pronounced it sibbOleth

There was a great episode of The West Wing, a show which I've gone on and on and on about in my blog many times over.. and 1 of my favourite eps ever is the one titled and revolving around the Shibboleth theme..

I'll never be able to write a synopsis or whatever which matches the wow-ness of that episode, but have found another site (thanks! to the author) which gives it quite a bit of justice, if nothing else, but replicating the material parts of the script...

Thursday Theology #150
April 26, 2001
"The Theology of West Wing"

Today's Thursday Theology comes from Jim Squire. After hearing that Paul's breakthrough on faith which became Luther's (Romans 1:16-17) actually came from one of the Hebrew prophets (Habakkuk) and that there is a minor tradition throughout Judaism that, when faced with the question asked of Jesus ("Which is the greatest sentence of the Law"), a person should answer Hab. 2:4 ("Look at the proud! Their spirit is not right in them, but the righteous live by their faith"), he remembered this episode of West Wing. It brings together two of Jim's passions -- finding connections between the Hebrew tradition and Lutheran theology as well as between faith and pop culture.

Enjoy!

---

Judges 12:5 through Judges 12:6
5Then the Gileadites took the fords of the Jordan against the Ephraimites. Whenever one of the fugitives of Ephraim said, "Let me go over," the men of Gilead would say to him, "Are you an Ephraimite?" When he said,"No," 6they said to him, "Then say Shibboleth," and he said, "Sibboleth," for he could not pronounce it right. Then they seized him and killed him at the fords of the Jordan. Forty-two thousand of the Ephraimites fell at that time.

I don't know if you have ever watched NBC's "The West Wing" on Wednesday nights, but this past Thanksgiving, they showed an episode of this award-winning drama entitled "Shibboleth". One of the subplots involved 83 Chinese refugees who showed up at San Diego harbor, fleeing from mainland China. This presented the Bartlett (Democrat) administration with quite a dilemma. The US is trying to forge a better relationship with China (the fictional US, that is!). So foreign policy seems to dictate that they be returned to their home country. On the other hand, everyone knows they will be tortured and maybe even killed if we do. The INS rules indicate that we must conduct a credible fear test before we even think about letting them into the country.

Then word comes that the Chinese refugees are seeking religious asylum, fleeing from religious persecution as Evangelical Christians. Now the Bartlett White House has its familiar Conservative Christian nemesis breathing down its neck, accusing Bartlett of turning a blind eye to the issue of persecution of Christians.

His deputy chief of staff, Josh Lyman, and his deputy communications director, Sam Seaborn are at a loss to know how to proceed (they've been taking all the meetings on the subject). They present the conflicting feedback they've been given, and Bartlett interrupts:

Bartlett: You guys know what a "shibboleth" is?

Seaborn: It's a catch-phrase, isn't it?

Lyman: ... a cliche (?)

Bartlett(don't ask me what version he is quoting): Comes from the bible. "Then said now unto him, 'say now shibboleth', and he said, 'sibboleth', for he could not frame to pronounce it right." It was a password, a way the army used to distinguish true Israelites from imposters sent across the Jordan river by the enemy. I'm having one of the Chinese refugees flown here. I'll meet with him tonight.

CJ Craig (press secretary): Mr. President, I can't, ya know, .... indefinitely with the turkey.

Bartlett: Yeah. [heads toward other room for the traditional "pardon the turkey" ritual]

Lyman: Excuse me Sir, what are you going to ask the man?

Bartlett: I'm going to ask him to say "shibboleth".

That evening:

Mrs. L: Ah, Mr. President?

Bartlett: Is he here?

Mrs. L: Yes sir.

McGarry (chief of staff): Did we get an interpreter?

Bartlett: He speaks English. He's a chemistry professor. There was a time I wanted to be a chemistry professor.

McGarrity: What happened?

Bartlett: I never actually took chemistry.

McGarrity: Well, a lot of these University chemistry departments are very demanding that way.

Bartlett: Yeah.

Mrs. L: Ah, Mr. President.

Bartlett: Chen We? (sp? pronounced "chen way")

Chen We: Yes sir. [they shake hands]

Bartlett: I'm Jeb Bartlett, this is Leo McGarry

McGarry: How do you do?

Bartlett: Thank you for coming all this way.

McGarry: Fellas, would you mind waiting outside?

Bartlett: Would you care to sit down? [pause] It's perfectly alright. [they sit] There's some sandwiches here, if you should feel hungry you should eat whatever you please.

Chen We: [shaking his head slightly] Yes sir.

Bartlett: There are some questions as to the veracity of your claim to asylum.

Chen We: Yes sir.

Bartlett: How did you become a Christian?

Chen We: I began attending a house church with my wife in PhuGien (sp?) Eventually, I was baptized.

Bartlett: How do you practice?

Chen We: We share bibles. There are not enough. We sing hymns, we listen to sermons. We recite the Lord's prayer. We are charitable.

Bartlett: Who is the head of your church?

Chen We: The head of our parish is an 84 year old man by the name of Wa Ling. He has been imprisoned and beaten many times. The head of our church is Jesus Christ.

Bartlett: Can you name any of Jesus' apostles? If you can't, it's okay. I usually have trouble remembering the names of my children or for that matter-

Chen We: -Peter, andrew, john, philipp, bartholomew, thomas, matthew, thaddeus, simon, judas, and James. [pause] Mr. President, Christianity is not demonstrated through a recitation of facts. You are seeking evidence of faith - whole hearted acceptance of God's promise for a better world. For we hold:

THAT MAN IS JUSTIFIED BY FAITH ALONE

is what St. Paul says, justified by faith alone! Faith is the true ... [struggles for right word] uh, I'm trying to... Shibboleth. Faith is the true Shibboleth.

Bartlett: Yes sir, it is. And you just said the magic word, in more ways than one. Thank you.

Chen We: Thank you, Mr. President. [he leaves]

[Bartlett turns to look at McGarry with a grim look on his face]

McGarry: [shrugging] We're trying to sell more 747's to China, already a big customer. We want China to crack down on violators of American copyrights. We're trying to get China to negotiate a settlement with Tibet.

Bartlett: Right.

McGarry: Right.

Bartlett: We don't have to grant asylum.

McGarry: If you are suggesting what I think you are, you should know that it has happened before.

Bartlett: Where are they?

McGarry: An INS detention facility in Note Mesa (sp?), guarded by INS agents aided by members of the 22nd division of the California national guard.

Bartlett: Not the coast guard?

McGarry: No.

Bartlett: Before, when it happened before, how did it work?

McGarry: Well, you don't want to piss off China, and you don't want to send them back, so you gotta ask yourself, how secure is the INS detention facility?

[they look at each other for a moment]

Bartlett: Mrs. Landingham?

Mrs. L: Yes sir?

Bartlett: I need to talk to the governor of California.

Mrs. L: Yes sir.

The next morning:

Josh Lyman: I am assuming you've heard.

Bartlett: About the Chinese refugees?

Sam Seaborn: They escaped.

Bartlett: Yeah, can you believe it?

Lyman: No, as a matter of fact, neither one of us can believe it, sir.

Bartlett: That detention center was being guarded by the 22nd division of the California national guard. Now, what does it say about our reserve Army-

Seaborn: -if 83 men, women, and children who haven't eaten for 2 months staged a prison break?

Bartlett: Let me read this (the draft of the thanksgiving day proclamation). "Well over three and a half centuries ago, strengthened by faith and bound by a common desire for liberty, a small band of pilgrims sought out a place in the new world where they could worship according to their own beliefs... " "Now therefore I, Josiah Bartlett, President of the United States, by virtue of the authority and laws vested in me, do hereby proclaim this to be a national day of thanksgiving.

Seaborn: I'll see you out there, sir.

Lyman(peering curiously at the president): You asked the governor to stand down the 22nd divsion.

(children can be heard singing "We gather together" in the background)

Bartlett: And call in the Red Cross. We didn't do anything illegal. You're not involved in any massive criminal conspiracy. There's no way I was going to let them go, and we needed to help China save face. So, now they can tell their people the mighty American military was overpowered by-

Lyman: -yeah. {Bartlett heads for the Rose Garden] So, the guy passed the test, huh.

Bartlett: You think I would have sent him back if he had failed catechism??? Let me tell you something. We can be the world's policeman, we can be the world's bank, the world's factory, the world's farm, but what does it mean if we're not also... They made it to the new world, Josh (smile breaking out all over his face). You know what I get to do now? I get to proclaim a national day of thanksgiving. This is a great job. ["Ladies and Gentlemen, the President of the United States"]

Lyman looks on with a smile on his face and begins to follow as the children can be heard singing:

"We gather together to ask the Lord's blessing
He chastens and hastens His will to make known
The wicked oppressing now cease from distressing
Sing praises to His name He forgets not His own."

Want Small Fame?

I've got an idea.. write a software program which automatically extracts your blog posts into book form (i.e. which you can print out) with comments beneath every post as footnotes..

If you know of existing software, lemme know!

I blog because...

I've been tagged by a laughing cow.. incidentally, FF blogged on a related topic too..

I've blogged (past tense) about why I blog (verb) in a few places strewn across my blog (noun). What I can think of now are:

a. It's a diary of sorts that I use to write down what I did and what I'm thinking.. I've said this before, and I find it really strange, but I was never terribly truthful about my feelings to my diary.. whereas in a blog, I guess the idea that someone I know in real life may read what I write forces me to be truthful.. of course there are places where I embellish, but those are rare..

b. I find it easier to tell my problems.. I've got a wonderful set of friends in real-life, but sometimes you just find it harder and don't know how to bring up your problems to your friends, especially when you know they are busy and all.. whereas in my blog, only the people who want to read / say something have to do it.. I don't put people in a position where they have to say something, as my real-life friends would..

c. A little bizarre, but you know that song where there lyrics go something along the lines of "so I have to say I love you, in a song"? I do suspect that there are real-life friends other than TL, YJ and 1 other person I cannot for the life of me remember right now, who read my blog.. I suspect my brother does, and perhaps a few uni friends.. whether they already do or 1 day may read what I write, they will know how much I love / appreciate them (and this has to be the sincere-est, ungarnished form of gushing I can have about my friends since the posts are not said, knowing these people will read them), or how upset sometimes the things they do, or say, make / made me.. So, for the one I love, if you ever read this, figuratively tie a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree to let me know if you feel you might be inclined to try something...

d. If I wanted to hear some support, I can get it more easily.. as I said above, I tend to be truthful in my blogging.. but if for some reason I wanted people to endorse my decisions, etc., I can manipulate my posts to solicit the support.. haha.. after all, if I were to blog about whether I should go after any particular girl, chances are that upwards of 65% of the responses will be in favor, even if she's totally not suitable for me, etc.

e. I get to make fun of / relive the old days with TL online.. how's that for cool!

The Decisive Force

Have been trying to get in touch with my reservist unit to re-schedule my RT sessions.. yes, yes, I've got to go for remedial training, cos I didn't take my IPPT test..

No one's picked up any of the phone lines until last Friday, when a clerk said that the whole unit had gone out for field training, including the RT clerk.. I find really really amusing the idea that there is a clerk somewhere in the jungles of Singapore, with pen and file, working out remedial training for reservist soldiers..

Alone

Lier's post reminded me of a story of being lost..

A buddy and I made plans to tour the USA for 5 weeks after our graduation.. at that time, her bf and her were having some problems, and I can't quite remember why, but only that there was a cold war between them.. the day before we were supposed to fly, he called me up, and essentially told me to take care of her, etc., but extracted a promise that I wouldn't tell her we'd spoken...

That night, he called her, and she found out from him that he had spoken to me earlier in the day.. accused me of disloyalty, etc. for not telling her.. the parting shot? She didn't want to go on the trip with me anymore..

Needless to say, cajoling, begging, pleading followed for the next 5 hours.. you can imagine the thoughts that crossed my mind.. how boring it'd be to travel alone for 5 whole weeks.. the accoms / flights that I'd already booked how, etc.

The begging continued into the night.. and I remember I was distressed enough even to call a friend I can't say I terribly liked on most days for commiseration, no, pity..

There was a little voice in my mind that buddy was trying to make me feel bad, and she'd go afterall, but that tiny voice was drowned by the screams going on in my head.. and worse bit was I was crucified for keeping a promise to someone I couldn't possibly / had no reason to refuse..

I don't even know how I managed to sleep that night.. but the next morning, tail between my legs, I called buddy, and she gave me some sanctimonious shit, but finally agreed to go..

If there was 1 thing I learnt from this, it's to steer clear of getting caught in other peoples' shit-slinging fights.. u can only lose..

+++

Onto happier stuff.. had dinner at Blooie's last night.. cheeseburger with 2x 2-cm beef patties.. shiokness! all for $14.. and we had a 15% discount, which negated the GST, service charge, blah blah blah..

Jack & Bobby

Heard about a new show in the US yesterday.. actually, Jack & Bobby has been showing in the US since last year...

If you've been reading my blog, you'd know how I'm a huge-ass fan of The West Wing.. to the extent that I even feel a little fear that the show might end its run if the Republican candidate, Vinnick, wins, even though I like him more than Matt Santos..

Anwyays, the show's premise is that Bobby is the President of the USA in 2041, and they show what his childhood was like.. Christine Lahti, whom some may remember from Chicago Hope, is their mother.. Jack's really good looking, like a really young version of Tom Cruise.. the first 2 eps have been a bit draggy, and I don't suppose it gets better, but I really like the idea!

+++

Feel like blogging about the female bloggers I'd date, but my results will be weird.. rather than choose the ones whom I'm attracted to based on character, I'd probably choose the ones who fascinate me the most simply because they are mysterious about their identity / I've never met them...

But a little nugget about me - actresses I most wanna date: Helen Hunt and Jodie Foster..

Wedding

2 law school friends got married today.. slightly embarassing cos the priest constantly mis-pronounced the male's name.. and claimed that the couple knew each other for 9 years when they've been together less than 2.. even when turn a blind eye, ignore the other people they were with, they knew each other as friends only for around 7.75 years.. could see KC, MG and LM look at each other with a smile.. you know, that kind of smile..

And I went to pick a certain someone up this morning to go to the wedding together.. when she got in the car, I smelt Country Apple, which was heavenly.. plus wet hair.. yums!

Anyways, I really wanted to blog abt something this past week, but just haven't had the time / energy / presence of mind to.. it was only when KC brought it up on 9 May that I remember they had just celebrated their 1 year wedding anniversary the day before.. felt really bad about it.. time really passes fast.. I remember when SF and I were running the whole wedding like it was 4 months ago, when it's actually been a whole year! 1 year of living together, sharing the same bed, brushing ure teeth at the same time, taking the train together to work, having breakfast looking at each other, waiting for each other 50% of the time in the evenings to go home together, watching tv with one peron's head on the other's shoulder.. now don't I want that kinda life... I wish I could write something far more articulate that this 40 wpm rambling, but I'm really, truly, happy for them.. my only regret is, as always, I wish I had a chance with her as well..

CSI

Was blogging, when I heard a plate drop against the floor.. thank god we have the unbreakable corelle plates.. hollered to my brother if everything was ok.. and he shouted for me to go to the kitchen..

beside the plate on the floor with the fridge door open was a whole chicken, neck and all.. can you imagine the brother doesn't dare to pick up a dead chicken even at the age of 24, even after spending 4 years in Chicago!!??!

BTP

140505

Nothing interesting lah.. Work-related post that I ought to be careful about..

Tribute

My 14th blog post ever was about a story I'd just read.. till today, it's my favourite blog post ever..

CM: I've still yet to watch Rouge, or for that matter, the rest of Three Colors.. tried to bid for it on Ebay at least 15 times, but it always gets too expensive!

A close second favorite...

Experiment

Was having a conversation with another blogger pertaining to the following topic:

It'd be quite interesting to choose any 5 random female bloggers who blog on a daily basis, and then mark the level of rage / emotional-ness daily on a 1 to 10 scale for 100 days.. wonder if you can really see monthly peaks...

Friendshit

Items no. 3 and 4 brought guffaws..

3.Switching off the main switch when one leaves for a month's holiday will cause the fridge to switch off and the explosive growth of a fungi based ecosystem on all the food you left in the fridge.
4. Cleaning up aforementioned fungi is the most disgusting task ever.

This was when we were all in the army, and hence a time when I kinda lost contact with the HJ bunch.. HJ switched off the power to his entire house before he left on 3-week military training in Taiwan..

When he came back, he had to pay YF to help with the clearing of the fridge.. there was (sing with me!) red and yellow and blue and green, purple and orange and pink.. I was never there, but I cringe everytime HJ regales us with this story, about how they had to tie t-shirts around their noses and pluck stuff out with plastic bags wrapped around their hands..

Walking backwards

Powerpuff's reflections on cowboycaleb's post..

The things that happened yesterday cast a grey pall, but I met up with HJ to go to the gym nonetheless.. it was quite apparent that I was rather down, for it was one of the occasions when I didn't have anything to say, not because the silence was comfortable (come to think of it, there is almost no such thing as comfortable silence with HJ, cos we are always folling around and stuff)..

The time we really talked was in the hot tub.. somehow we were talking about the crazy antics of youth, and I told him about 1 half-hatched money-making idea I had in law school.. we worked out the figures, and realised that we could definitely do it again and make some coffee money! For a capital outlay of $300 each, we could possibly reap $4000 nett, and after involving some people we have in mind to collaborate with, we could each make $1000 for minimal effort.. and best thing? repeatable twice a year..

HJ said aloud what was on my mind: that it was not so much the money as would be the silly fun we would have undertaking this project, and the 200 times we will get to retell this story over the next 50 years..

Anyways, TL, we are pleased to inform you that you have been chosen from a select list of candidates to partake of this project.. details will be forthcoming when we meet this weekend!

Granny II

Saw granny yesterday... it was heart-wrenching to see her bed-ridden and emanciated.. barely had the energy to lift her arms, and her speech was slurry...

The most painful thing to see was the panel which my dad had put up at the side of her bed to make sure that she couldn't fall off the bed (this happened earlier this year, and caused a laceration at her eyelid).. to be really frank, she looked like a caged animal, and it was especially ironic that I think she didn't even have the energy to roll her body over even if she wanted..

You really wonder if it's better to hear that a loved one died suddenly, or to see him/her deteriorate before your very own eyes..

Grandmother's Day

Apparently my granny's health has taken a significant turn for the worse over the past week.. she's no long able to get out of bed by herself, amongst other things, which leads my dad to conclude (though I wonder where he gets such "experience" from) that she doesn't have long (irreverent, but the same way he concludes that the RMB will be revalued in a matter of days)..

Had meant to visit her yesterday, but dad gave me a miss cos he either thought I was already out or having a nap (neither, cos I was poring through some freaking boring and technical bid documents for a huge project), and I'd totally have lived to regret it if she passed on before I could see her today.. it's strange (ok, not so strange considering human frailty) that you dramatise things when you are scared... I woke up at 7+ am this morning to the home phone ringing (it almost never does ring at this time of the day)... it was raining and thundering (is there such a "verb"? there must be if the word's an adjective as well); I was waiting for someone to shout or come through my door with the news, but thankfully no such thing happened...

I've written about some of the more deeply-etched memories about granny here, but here are a couple more:
a. my staple when I was a kid was thick congee, with bits of minced pork, flaky fish and nicely cut up vegetables.. I can remember granny running after me, the image of the long metal spoon laden with congee approaching / entering my mouth.. how she had to concoct stories of my mouth being a rubbish truck and the congee being garbage to convince me to eat a few more mouthfuls

b. I was skinny and frail as a kid, and she'd stuff all manner of medicines, western and oriental, down my throat.. hence my affinity with the old-style Breacol (which apparently drug addicts down by the bottleful when they don't have money for their fix). Needless to say, I was also accused of having worms in my tummy..

c. When I was staying with / visiting her as a kid, I'd use to fold paper boats to sail / float along the flodded paths and drains outside her kampung house when it was raining.. there'd always be a thermos full of scalding black coffee waiting for anyone who was feeling chilly..

d. I don't know if she cultivated in me or I had a natural a love for the Narcissus brand pig trotters, you know, the one with the really fragrant oil and the single chestnut.. but she'd cooked lotsa stuff with it all the time.. it was an addiction which was next to impossible to wean myself off...

Maybe part of the reason why I don't bother to see her often is that, in a way, I want to preserve the memories of her as someone who took wonderful care of me in the way she knew how, the spritely woman who'd kick many others' asses, and not the senile lady who can't even remember who I am..

Anyways, we're off at 2pm, and I hope that this won't be the last time I get to see her..

Mother's Day

In the spirit of Mother's Day, I shall write a mother-related post..

The Last Time I was Caned

Ok, I can't be entirely sure this was the last time I was caned, but it's the one I remember, if nothing else, then for my own stupidity..

In secondary 2, I sat beside 1 of my best friends, the infamous HJ that you all have read so much about in my blog. The mischief that we were up to, coupled with the fact that I'm terribly careless by nature (I recoil with terror at the thought of the number of times I've typed "not" instead of "now" in my work emails!!), meant that I got ridiculous grades..

There was a math test I distinctly recall I got 47 marks for.. I must have looked very edgy the moment I stepped past the door, for mom asked twice that evening if I was feeling ill.. after dinner, I decided the only way to get out of the mess was to forge her signture on the test paper...

I was so intent in practicing her signature on a sheet of rough paper beside my test results that I didn't realise she had walked into my room with fruits..

Punishment: 6 strokes

Warmth

My family's not one for open expressions of affection, and I can't say I'm close to my parents (long story), but there is no doubt that I have bottomless gratitude for my parents.. for dealing with her (then) evil mother-in-law, for driving me even when I was 20 from home to Lim Chu Kang camp every Sunday night...

It's strange what love means to you as a kid, but what I most remember as a sign that my mom loved me was when she ironed my school uniform shirt on the school morning itself.. the enveloping warmth as I put the shirt remains etched in my mind..

Craving

I'd pay $20 to sink my teeth into a good cinnamon bun right now..

Thought of the Day - 070505

If black is a slimming color, does wearing a black bikini make your breasts look smaller?

Ah Beng Application Form

From an email from a friend:
Edited: Actually from Talking Cock

The CHAP SAR TIAM SECRET SOCIETY, a Geylang-based organization for youth, is now recruiting members.

Please fill in the form below and mail to:

Mr. Chao Ah Beng
Membership Occifer
Chap Sar Tiam Secret Society
69 Geylang Lorong 69
Singapore 696969


Reference code: TalkingCock.com

APPLICATION FOR MEMBERSHIP IN CHAP SAR TIAM SECRET SOCIETY

1. NRIC No.: _________________

2. Surname: __________________

3. First name: (please X)
[ ] Johnson
[ ] Benson
[ ] Samson
[ ] Hamson
[ ] Janson
[ ] Other: _________________ (if not ending in ‘son’, please explain why)

4. Chinese Name: Ah __________(if not beginning with ‘Ah’, please explain why)

5. Age: [ ] Under 35 [ ] Lau Beng

6. Sex: [ ] M [ ] F [ ] at Geylang

7. Length of Last Fingernail: ________ (cm)

8. Ability to squat for:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] more than 2 hours (wah, steady!)

9. Hairstyle:
[ ] Spiky
[ ] Dyed with streaks of blond
[ ] Dyed with streaks of red
[ ] Two strands dangling in front of eyes
[ ] Kana mop like that
[ ] Perm (please state which saloon in JB you went)____________________

10. Tattoo of:
[ ] Tiger
[ ] Dragon
[ ] Snake
[ ] Eagle
[ ] Hello Kitty

11. Work experience: (please X all that apply)
[ ] KTV Launge Bouncer
[ ] Snooker Hall Attendant
[ ] Unlicensed Contractor
[ ] Freelance debt collector
[ ] Unlicensed bookie
[ ] Dispute Resolution and Settlement Professional
[ ] Unemployed

12. Spouse's Name: _________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: _________________________
3rd Spouse's Name: (the one in Batam, that one) _________________________
Lover's Name: _________________________
2nd Lover's Name: (Lorong 69, that pooi-pooi one) _________________________

13. Number of children living in household: ____
Number of children living in foster care: ____
Number of children that are actually yours: ____

14. Mother's Name: _________________________ (If not sure, leave blank)
15. Father's Name: _________________________ (If not sure, leave blank)

16. Education: (Circle how many years it took you to finish primary school)
8 9 10 11 12

17. Ability to swear: (please X all that apply)
[ ] Hokkien
[ ] English
[ ] Malay
[ ] Tamil
[ ] Cantonese
[ ] rude hand gestures

18. Service performed in previous secret society:
[ ] Leadership/Tua Tao
[ ] Junior management/Suay Tao
[ ] Physical activities/Hooting
[ ] Dispute Resolution and settlement/Cham Siong
[ ] Lookout/Kuah Chui

With your application, please also enclose sample of blood (need not be your own).

You Learn New Things Everyday - 050505

It's not a good idea to listen to Always Look on the Bright Side of Life in public places cos you will start whistling, and people will think ure a dufus.

Protect me

You Learn New Things Everyday - 040505

Mrs. Field's cookies taste nasty after the 5th day, even if they've been carefully stored in tupperwares...

Belly of the Whale

Can you think of the most despairing moment in your life?

I know mine, and surprisingly, it's not the death of a loved one, nor about a girl...

It was a cold, wet, rainy night in the Lim Chu Kang jungle, our 3rd day in the field... I'd been asked to lay 800m of telecommunications cable through the heavy vegetation.. once in a while the bare steel strand (exposed because the bastard who used it before me didn't tape it back properly after he joined cut sections) would cut into my palm as I unwound it, and the wire just kept tangling every 15 meters or so... after trying to un-tangle everything every 4 minutes for the 25th time, I just sat down in the mud and cried for what must have been 20 minutes, and kept whacking my helmet against the ground...

Cat 17, Mom&Pop 1

There is a cat who absolutely loves to pee and crap at our front garden.. almost everyday, I see a pile of turd as I go to pick up the morning papers.. and the parents have tried 10,000 things to discourage it: pesticide, changing the granite slabs it uses as the crapping platform, etc.

The newest weapon I saw this morning: Super Soaker.. haha.. apparently they got the bugger yesterday with a good clean squirt up his / her ear...

Hmm... is it cruelty to animals if we were to use water bombs a la secondary school?

Bagus

Will leave it to TL to write a far more eloquent post, but it was a good trip all in all.. there were tons of hilarous moments (TL: it's ure duty to record all the gems!), but the best one by far was HJ saying "you know you are right road leading to Jln. Bt. Bintang when you see a big sign that says F U". Of course he meant "airfield", but all of the other 4 of us definitely heard otherwise...

As I said, the part I was most looking forward to was us spending enforced BOH ("Brotherhood of Honor", but that's another story for another time) time together.. for a reason that need not be said here, all of us didn't have to make / receive sit-rep phone calls to / from whoevers, and it was nice that way.. we all sat on 1 bed and played Uno... forfeit: drink the red-wine-slosh that I got from a colleague for Christmas last year..

No disrespect whatsoever, but TL always ends up drinking the most when we play drinking games.. he went down round after round when we played 5-10 at Zouk, and the best part was that we weren't even ganging up against him / rigging it.. thank goodness the rubbish bin we placed beside his bed didn't come into use.. hee hee.. we have taught you well, young Jedi...

And I realise I'm definitely not a casino person.. at Genting, I changed a measley RM100 in chips, and decided to stop after making RM100 at dice in 3 rounds.. I'm perfectly comfortable wagering S$10,000 for a S$500 gain / loss on an IPO morning, but the prospect of losing RM100 at card games / dice squeezes my nuts..

Am craving durian right now.. we were eating right next to a durian stall last night, but just couldn't find that extra little space in our stomachs cos we over-ordered zzz-char..

Doesn't sound like a particularly interesting trip? perhaps.. but it was the company that mattered the most, and it kicked ass..

Popemobile II

Pope's old VW Golf sold on ebay for Euro 62,000.. link from cowboycaleb

Unbelievable! This is not an ordinary car. Your driving will always be save and blessed in it. You won't belive it, but the former car-holder was our new pope Benedict XVI (Josef Kardinal Ratzinger). This can be proved by the registration document as you can see in the picture below. The car looks as if it was new due to the care it god. The original seats haven't been changed yet. As it is a private auction I don't guarantee anything. I pay the ebay fees. The car can only be bought if you are able to pick it up yourself.